ZenVlog

It started just after he saw his sister make an ass of herself and embarrass the family.

Is he fat again? Guess so.

Good for him, said someone ho does terribly in crowds.

I would hate to do promotional work for books, movies, songs, etc. I don’t know how celebrities do it, because I would have a major panic attack from all the fake chatter. I could do interviews or act on stage, just not the promotion circus.

Two dysfunctional peas in a pod. Or pumpkins in a patch. Or watermelons in a field.

Two asshats.

Good luck getting those new films, dumb ass. What is this trend of celebrities turning their backs on the duties that come with their professions?

Especially celebrities who never should have had a career in the first place.

Suddenly he's having anxiety attacks, after how many years of doing promotion? And really, how taxing is it to be interviewed about work you should already be engaged about? Sounds like the excuse of a lazy, slacker actor.

Well, he's fat, lazy and entitled. Not surprising.

Is everyone mentally ill?

Just smoke copious amounts of pot, silly!

And his sister blows off her first shows after openig night and quit the run early. Being fat slackers is a family trait.

They kept asking him questions about his sister, which really pissed him off.

So he doesn’t want to show up for a large portion of his job?

And in a related story:

Having achieved and surpassed ALL of her loft career goals,

Jonah's sister Beanie Feldstein will also take a step back from her duties as the "First Lady of American Theatre"

Well, you have to understand, it's not like he's getting paid millions and millions of dollars.

He shouldn't be paid at all. He should compensate us for sitting through crap.

I'm trying to remember a more unlikable star. He's not even fuckable

He's fuckable if you're a chubby chaser, R18. And yes, I know, I'm being generous when saying he's chubby.

So.

This fat lump of self regard, famous chiefly for being a fat, loud lump of self-regard, wants us to:

1. Not think he's fat.

2. Not expect him to show up on chat shows and tell us about his latest work, I Am Thin and Gorgeous.

Okey-doke.

I've never got the appeal of this guy, and I'm not one of those people who usually prefers character actors to the generic, minimal talented actors holly typically pushes, especially in more recent times. This guy wouldn't have made it if not for nepotism and now wants the very minimum he can and still have a career.

He’s so full of shit! He loves hamming it up for the camera and trying to get attention in interviews. He must be obese again and is embarrassed by that. Anxiety my foot!

You make millions of dollars you lazy ass slob. Either promote the films or give the parts to someone who will.

I never liked this piece of shit after he was caught screaming “fag.”

I never liked this piece of shit, period.

Effective in Wolf of Wall Street, unbearable in everything else.

His presence won’t be missed.

How will earth continue to spin?

R27, without his gravitational pull, it may be a problem.

Mental illness is the “exhaustion”

I missed the memo. What nepotism does Jonah and Beanie derive the please of being hired for acting gigs? Is their father connected to show biz? I really don't know

This is GREAT, guys! It will quicken his fucking the fuck off!

R30 their father is a big time accountant for lots of music acts.

What a miserable fat fuck.

I will never forgive this lump of blubber, James Franco and their asshole friends for that movie where the world ends and somehow they don't all immediately fry in hell.

Seth Rogan, the other fat guy, is funnier.

It's fun talking to the plebs, asking them mundane questions, and learning new stuff every day.

R2 Good for him, said someone who couldn’t give a shit.

I guess he thinks that if it worked for Julie Kavner, it can work for him. If that were me, I'd probably try medication first. But I'm also self-aware and not entitled.

I’ve heard he’s incredibly coarse and rude.

Their older brother Jordan died about 5 years ago. He had a blood clot in leg but was obese and had addiction issues.

It looks like he only has one more project which is a movie he co wrote.

Stunt. He can still promote on social media which is more important that talk shows. Plus no one give a fuck anyway.

I mix him up with Seth Rogan all the time. But Seth is funny . Anyway, this dude has never been funny. He has nepotism on his side similar to Kristen Stewart.

Jonah Hill wants you to know he’s not doing ok.

Can't he make Beanie disappear?

It's probably for the best. His interviews show what a whiny, humorless, dickhead he is. He holds grudges too. And talks about minor slights from years ago. Real mass shooter energy

he doesn't give interviews because he doesn't want to defend his sister's bratty behavior and overall wretched undertaking of the role of Fanny Brice

Unless there is a buffet, that is.

I have a funny Jonah Hill story....

I think it was early 2007 (maybe late 2006?) and I was heading to my buddy's house. He lived just south of Hollywood Blvd, east of La Brea. Right adjacent to Hollywood High School. Parking was a bitch and I had to park far away, then hike back up to his place.

As I walked, there happened to be these two twenty-somethings who were just ahead of me, walking in the same direction. One was super fat. The other skinny. A very odd pair for sure.

They were clearly drunk and talking super loud as they bantered and swayed down the street. They were basically Bro-ing out. Telling the other how great the other was. So annoying. But harmless.

I laughed as I walked behind them because, at one point, the fat one kept saying how famous he was going to be. Once "the movie" came out. It was so obnoxious and SO LA. I just assumed he was yet another out of work actor. The skinny one though? His voice seemed familiar. But I couldn't place it.

At any rate, just as I reached my friend's place, I had passed them up. I glanced back and, as I did, I finally placed the skinny one: Michael Cera. The fat annoying one? Jonah Hill. They were talking about Superbad. And Jonah was right. He was about to be famous.

I actually have a spot soft for him after my weird little interaction. It was oddly endearing.

[Quote] I will never forgive this lump of blubber, James Franco and their asshole friends for that movie where the world ends and somehow they don't all immediately fry in hell.

I don't think Emma Watson will either. The only memorable scene is Channing's cameo as a sex slave.

I know he has a negative reputation and has a pretty cushy life, but for some reason, I've always felt sorry for him

R50 So he got the fame he wanted, and now he has “anxiety”? These people don’t know what the fuck they want.

[quote]What is this trend of celebrities turning their backs on the duties that come with their professions?

Is his "profession" actor or celebrity?

He can act and not do promotion. The problem is people keep conflating the two.

If he wants to be a celeb then he has to do promotion. If he wants to act in a project as a lead with lots of financial backing then he'll probably have to do promotion.

[quote]So he got the fame he wanted, and now he has “anxiety”? These people don’t know what the fuck they want.

Something tells me that his life circumstances are a bit different now than they were years ago. Be careful what you wish for ... you just might get it.

Daniel Day Lewis managed to have a career without "celebrity" in his later years.

"Look, I just want to spend more time with my food, and my sister wants to spends some quality time with her cats, so just suck my dick, faggots!"

The sad thing is, he thinks people will care if he commits suicide.

Wow. Such a tough life. How does he cope??!

Nepo babies are exhausting and need to be driven out of the business.

His career is basically dead. No one cares about him. Does he have anything coming up? Never mind. I don’t care. Both he and his miserable sister could drop off the face of the earth and no one would care.

He's a mean, rotten slob. He should stay in his hole until he learns how to respect people.

^ Tell us what you know, R62.

I like him. I like his sister too. I don’t need to find an actor attractive to find them enjoyable to watch. I don’t think he’s a really strong actor, he and Franco proved they weren’t in that movie “True Story” but in the right role I think Jonah is really good.

I don't like him and won't miss him, but all that film promotion nonsense is outdated and unnecessary, in my opinion. There are now dozens of ways to promote your product, and it should be mostly the studio's or distributor's responsibility. Aren't we all sick of seeing celebrities shilling their films on talk shows, pretending they're there because they want to be?

Some people say he’s the 2nd greatest actor that ever lived.

“I only do the fun parts of my job, not the stressful, icky bits!”

Must be nice

So he's made a documentary about his therapist - a therapist he's been seeing for four years and yet has apparently made so little progress that he's actually regressing, and now unable to do his job. Great advertising there.

"This Is The End" is Hill's best movie -- "No! Don't titty fuck me!"

Why is he always tiptoeing through the tulips 🌷 in Capri pants with a venti ICED oat milk latte, yelling “No, you’re a faggot!”

A friend of mine is a film critic who gave that world end movie a bad review and Jonah Hill harassed her about it through an anonymous twitter account - it was very clearly him. He's pathetic

He looks like complete shit with long hair and a beard. He seems like one of those people who think because he's in the movie business that means he's somehow better than those who are not and that has developed into a massive case of arrogance and pomposity. He clearly does not look in the mirror much. I imagine if he knew what a lot of people (in and out of show business) probably say about him behind his back he wouldn't be so uppity.

What did his sister do that so embarrassed him?

Fat people should avoid standing or sitting too long after they get covid vaccines. Embolism.

I was going to say: Hey, Jonah, wait until you actually have star billing in a movie before you say what you will or won't do to promote it - but that's not going to happen so I won't bother.

He’s an entitlement prick, Hollywood veal pen bitch, a “gimmie gimmie” just like his rancid sister, the family is known to be odious, especially the insane matriarch. Hill was so unstable during a junket stop for 21 Jump Street that he cried like a baby before being “forced” to attend some early morning chat responsibilities and actually screamed for his mother when he had to take a normal public elevator to an appointment. This is a spoiled fat cunt.

[Quote] Good for him, said someone ho does terribly in crowds.

I hazard to guess you're not an actor, r2? Coming from him it's a bit extra.

This guy is so easy to hate. He’s like the uglier, older, hairier version of Justin Beiber.

That's a great story r50.

Gee, I'll bet everybody would like to simply not do certain parts of their jobs because it "causes stress," but that really isn't the way the world works for the 95% of us who aren't independently wealthy.

Imagine a firefighter deciding that going into burning buildings is simply too anxiety-inducing so he'll keep being a firefighter but he just won't do that part of the job anymore. But you still need to pay me! Imagine doctors and nurses doing that.

Grow a fuckin' pair, Jonah. Life is stressful, work is stressful. For all of us.

Was Jonah in Freaks and Geeks? Yes? No?

That's OK, Jonah, we didn't plan on seeing them anyway.

R74, I believe it. I noticed that every interview he brings up some grudge that's years old. I can't remember what they were, they were so minor, but I can't believe he does either. Let alone bring it up on The Daily Show

I don't have panic attacks. I'm used to public speaking. But I've decided not to do any more. I just don't see any need. I can relate with Jonah.

What exactly is the point of him again?

Cushy or not he’s going to prison and he will forever be a felon until he’s dead, which will hopefully happen soon rather than later.

I think the last thing I saw Jonah in was some Netflix show with Emma stone. His character was so annoying, and Jonah has so few redeeming on-screen characteristics, it became a really aggravating show to sit through. I think I made it through 3 episodes?

And that was 5? Years ago? Can’t remember seeing anything from Jonah lately. Good riddance.

He and don lemon had some kind of hotel scuffle, but they both sounded like assholes from what I remember.

Well, at least I'm fit and pretty.

Jonah Hill was responsible for the laugh-free animated tree-blight known as Allen Gregory, which also had an ugly sideline in kneejerk homophobia vis-a-vis the appalling "two dads" of the title character.

For that and that alone, he can choke on his narcissism.

The only reason anyone would want to see this movie is because Jonah made it (no one has heard of the therapist or cares about him) and Jonah refuses to do publicity to help sell tickets?

How do his financial investors feel about that?

Who are he & his sister related to? There’s no way either one of them attained fame on their “talent.”

Sure promoting films sucks. You have to say the same thing over and over again to every media outlet. You have to appear on stupid midnight shows.

But, heck, that’s why you got paid $10 million for your movie

Is Jonah a lebsian like their big sister?

Jonah...and the whale (Beanie Baby Dyke).

R101 His siblings are pigs.

(And Mel doesn't like pigs)

[Quote] Can’t remember seeing anything from Jonah lately. Good riddance.

I think the last big role was Don't Look Up.

The only film i liked him in is Don't Look Up.

Cant stand this fat ugly boring man. He should go the route of his fat untalented sister and vanish.

He's good at playing a fat ugly great self-serving man.

Jonah was funny in Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Watching Russell Brand treat him like crap was great.

I have anxiety and I flamed out at the beginning of my career and became an office frau instead. How did this guy get so far suffering major anxiety?

His face is so punchable in this clip. Can’t even stand to look at his disgusting ass.

(Sotto voce) Jonah. Wait. Come back.

"I have anxiety! Now I DO have something in common with Chris Evans!!"

Every time I've seen him in anything, without exception, I've had the unexplainable urge to slap the shit out of him.

R113 So it’s not just me!

Only every saw him in Moneyball with Brad Pitt. He was really one-note (babe in the woods facial expression) and I was aware of him acting throughout.

Sister is Beanie Feldstein, actress, who just departed early from playing Fanny Brice (Funny Girl) on Broadway. Reviews had been mixed, anyway. I'm guessing this is what posters upthread have been referring to.

Agree that the promotion (appearing on talk shows) seems outdated and just boring to watch, anyway.

That said, he does seem to be acting like a tender snowflake.

Daniel Day Lewis is not American. Plus, he's DDL. The rules don't apply.

What is next for Beanie Hill?

How did he even get into the movies at all?

You guys are harsh, I'm sure there's huge weight on his shoulders.

Looking at this IMDB page I have seen him on screen precisely two times. Hail, Caesar! in 2016 and NYPD Blue in 2004. I guess I can spare his promotion attempts.

One Feldstein may be bearable but two Feldsteins are too much.

Some of the leaked Sony emails made him seem like a real douche. And, a not very smart one.

I like him in all the movies I've seen Superbad, get Him to the Greek, etc. He was funniest younger and fatter.

Anyone can be funny when they're young and fat R124

You people shouldn't be making fun of him because he's fat. Make fun of him because he's morbidly obese.

This is an extremely feminine move on his part. Not gay, feminine --- big difference. After this announcement, I think he's going to transition into an autogynephile in the near future. This style of public self victimization only leads to that. btw I love dolls like Amanda Lepore and Hari Nef and Kim Petras. Not a big fan of autogynephiles who are just narcissistic, ruthlessly ambitious, and males. Autogynephiles are todays "nice guys".

Oh, no! This is a disservice to all. We need him to actively promote his work. We need him to remind us which films feaure his blown up, fat and mediocre mug, so we can avoid the horror.

Someone's taking pointers from Mo'Nique.

This blurb from his sister's Wikipedia is BRUTAL (and hilarious):

[quote]On August 11, 2021, it was announced that she would star as Fanny Brice in the 2022 Broadway revival of Funny Girl.[4] Reviews of her performance were mixed to negative. Jesse Green at The New York Times called her "good" but "not stupendous," while Adrian Horton at The Guardian opined that Feldstein "simply isn't" a "power singer."

He was good in The Wolf of.Wall Street, but the scene where he masturbates in public is repulsive.

This fat loser should be cancelled.

[quote]One Feldstein may be bearable but two Feldsteins are too much.

You're telling me!

Of course the lovers of Twitter rush to his defense; they'd have their own anxiety attacks if they saw this thread.

I bet he’s microwaving 2 burritos at this very moment.

^ 2? It's 4, at the least.

Anxiety from all the money he lost on Beanie’s Funny Girl?

R104, did he play the meteor?

You can’t microwave 4 burritos at once!

Not sure about a toaster oven though 🤔

[quote]You can’t microwave 4 burritos at once!

Where there's a will there's a way. —fat whores everywhere

I can see him having two microwaves, come to think of it

R139 has never the seen the special microwaves they've got chez Feldstein.

We just don't understand Jonah's pain.

What does fun Lezzie Beanie think 🤔 of Jonah’s ranting homophobia?

"He's a mean, rotten slob. He should stay in his hole until he learns how to respect people."

You just described actors and republic party members.

Has anyone ever seen Jonah and Beanie at the same time? I thought not. They're the same, horrid person.

Why does Beanie and Jonah has different last names if there related?

Give his work to some other fugster who will promote the films.

PR is why movie stars earn the big bucks.

R96, the story is that Jonah was friend's with Dustin Hoffman's kids in college and brownosed the family into somehow getting his first acting credit in I Heart Huckabees.

I saw him in person years ago introducing a screening of one of his films at the festival. He seemed very shy and modest.

Anyway, good for him and anybody else that doesn't want to participate. I really don't think all the promotional stuff people in the entertainment industry makes much difference on the outcome of viewership, box office and sales.

[quote] I really don't think all the promotional stuff people in the entertainment industry makes much difference on the outcome of viewership, box office and sales.

Speelburg says he allocates 30% of the. budget on promotion.

Now that 30% of tens of millions of dollars!

Spielbergstein is a hack and a has-been.

His opinion is about as relevant as Menahem Golan‘s these dayz.

R150 did Jonah also get yelled at by David O Russell?

Promotion is, quite literally, half the job. The only people that can get away with something like refusing this are major talents like a Daniel Day Lewis, a three time Oscar winner. Jonah will never get an Oscar and he doesn’t really have an audience or fans unless he plays a fat loser in an ensemble comedy, so he pretty much buried his career with this statement. No one will miss him.

If you are a male actor:

You can be ugly and likable (Danny DeVito)

You can be beautiful and likable (Robert Downey Jr.)

You can be beautiful and unlikable (Marlon Brando - although this has to come with a generous helping of professionalism in other departments)

Ugly and unlikable is a hard row to hoe.

It's also a hard row to ho, come to think of it.

I can usually sympathize with anxiety issues as I have had to deal with them throughout my entire life. However. This entitled piece of shit needs to take a Xanax and do the freakin job he was hired to do. THIS IS PART OF THE JOB!

This guy’s whole persona is wrapped around being mean and bitchy, while accusing people provoking him with their meanness and bitchiness. He’s exhausting. Such a victim.

Yeah, I think he just doesn’t want to wear a belt.

In what way is RDJ likeable?

Anxiety attacks affect different people - especially those who can’t sing a Broadway score. My sister comes to mind.

These things are by nature somewhat subjective R160, but RDJ is generally a vivacious, responsive person in interviews and gets on well with costars, fans, the press, etc. You may not find him likable, but a broad range of audiences seem to.

He's also dealt with personal issues without blaming other people or banging on about it in public.

RDJ is a douche. Let him go.

I love being told by random internet nobodies who to like and not like. I always follow their advice, particularly when backed up by acres of convincing detail, as in R163.

Jonah is a bad as we’re making him out to be, an entitlement fraud with zero range and a MASSIVE and FRAGILE ego that reeks of nasty impulses. It’s ironic he’s “not doing pr because of mental health” because he drove everyone insane when he barely DID saunter into the junket rooms to blame and cry foul about everything. He and his non-charisma sister are two of the most dreadful energies you will ever encounter. These are foot stomping rage babies who ALWAYS want to take ALL of the craft services items home after “working” their easy peasy production day. CUNTS!

Marta Plipton has nothing but good things to say about Jonah.

Marta Plipton? Of the Greenwich Pliptons?

Who cares? Jonah is "annoying, Fat and Ugly"!!

The End.

Im with R168 ! Too fug to care about !

He thinks he has problems?

Typically at least an additional third of a film’s budget is a spent post-production for advertising, which why a film needs to make 2-3 times its reported budget to turn a profit. I think one of the highest grossing Harry Potter movies is still in the red. Lots of creative accounting going on.

Sending actors and their entourages around the world on junkets and publicity tours, paying for their stylists and assistants, TV spots, newspaper ads, hiring venues for press meetings, trailers, billboards cost mega bucks. Jennifer Lawrence isn’t taking her stylist and her Dior gowns to a Travelodge.

It seems insanely wasteful but it works. It’s why filmmakers complaint that they can make a film for $2 million or $82 million but it is difficult to raise money for a $22 million film. Distributors won’t spend an extra $5 million on advertising to make a small profit on a mid-list drama when they can spend an extra $30 million and make blockbuster dough.

Why are these two fat schmucks taking work and attention from thin people? And the handful of thin and talented people too?

[quote]Typically at least an additional third of a film’s budget is a spent post-production for advertising, which why a film needs to make 2-3 times its reported budget to turn a profit. I think one of the highest grossing Harry Potter movies is still in the red.

So those are two different issues.

Generally speaking, a film needs to make back 2 times its budget to cover its production costs, as cinemas keep approximately half. Then there's the marketing budget on top.

The creative accounting is used to make sure the studios don't have to pay out on royalty or profit-sharing deals, etc. So the Potter film, even with its marketing costs, absolutely made a profit for WB. They just don't want to have to share that profit with anyone.

Jonah is a two-time Oscar nominee (for Moneyball and The Wolf of Wall Street). He deserves our respect!

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